Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[Former-Member]

Having friends over for lunch tomorrow @outlander  rain predicted .. How about you?

[outlander]

We have some more rain predicted too @Former-Member I've got a birthday event but other than that it's looking pretty quiet

[Sophia1]

Hello @outlander 

I logged on briefly and saw your tag.

I have read your post opening up about your struggles in the role of a young carer.

It is no small wonder that you are feeling a myriad of emotions I imagine.

That would be a huge load for an older person in a carer role.

You are 22years old.

You are one brave..strong young lady...

Feeling so weighed down with what you have described would bring about despair for most people...even more so young carers again I need to make this point.

I hope that I am not ,merely repeating what others have said. Part of practising my self-care is to not be on the forums as often and therefore it becomes difficult to know everything that has preceded your post.

I apologise for that and please do not feel that you need to reassure me...You have done that so many times already in the past and I know that you always appreciate the help of others...forever grateful and trying to be there for so many.

I understand your comments about hanging back in certain conversations.. I do the same..It can lead to other emotions..thoughts arising as in not feeling that we are there enough for others...Reminding ourselves that we have been in the past can help allay feelings of guilt...We owe it to ourselves...We deserve to practise self care. ...We come here looking for help for ourselves initially then want to reach out and help others who help us... We cannot be there all of the time for others as well as continue to work on ourselves...working towards a better quality of life...

Most people will understand this....There is no need for us to worry about this either...Others are experiencing their own struggles...We are not being selfish putting ourselves first for a change..

I found this website which you might have been told about or explored and found yourselves a trillion times already..

I want to leave this here for you just in case...I never like to assume that a person already knows everything that they need to...

Extending my hand out to hold yours letting you know that you matter so much....

Here is the information..

https://youngcarersnetwork.com.au/

There are some interesting directions that might lead to information you may not already have or perhaps even forgotten due to brain overload.

Please look into the young carers options...I am utilising the carers group outings myself and have met some wonderful people..They all have their own pain ...Many of them have beautiful souls just like yourself...Being in there company without necessarily discussing struggles I find mostly to be very calming..

I hope that you can feel this too...even starting off with phone counselling to begin with then allowing yourself to make time to attend meetings or outings..There are some changes happening. At the same time there are some new opportunities arising in the mental health area....as in mental health support for the carer or caree..

If you know all of this already..having a reminder that you are so very entitled to this support is here for you..

🌹💚💜

Take care dear Outlander

[outlander]

thank you @Sophia1 i hope its ok to respond abit later. i am way to overwhelmed to respond. between pop and his mates being so so loud- they talk over the top of each other when they both want their point across (plus they are both hard on hearing), sister wanting something, mum wanting something, being pressured into something else and pain i can barely see the words properly

[Smc]

@outlander . Thinking of you.

[outlander]

thanks @Smc

[Sophia1]

Please do not concern yourself about reading my epic response to you @outlander 

You are doing exactly what I hoped for ....putting yourself first....

So this relieves my concerns somewhat...

My response is not going anywhere...will be waiting for you when and if you are ready....however long it takes...

You are the focus here...

I hope that with so much pressure coming at you from what seems almost every angle...that you reach out and vent....even just breathe while someone listens on the other end of the phone....

You do matter xxx💜

[outlander]

thank you @Sophia1 i have read your response and i want to give you a proper response. you matter and what you say matters to me.
i will go back and re-read and hopefully i can get something out that makes sense...

[Sophia1]

later @outlander 

reserve your energy for recuperating your strength is what I want you to do..

do not reply to my epic now...

please...

will be in touch when I can xxx💛

[outlander]

Thank you @Sophia1
I was experiencing a myriad of emotions however lately I am empty. Stuck. Sad. There isnt much left in me for anything. My day to day stuff is being done on autopilot, anything outside of that I have a panic attack.
Ive got some supports in place but their help doesnt seem to be helping even though they are trying to- like suggesting other meds or ways to cope etc but I just cant seem to get into what they are saying or wanting me to do. Im not to sure that makes sense...
I am stuck between caring to much and not caring at all. More siding with not caring at all. Im very 'uh huh, ok' all the time.
April is a rather bad month and im worried if this is how I am atm how much lower or worse could I go.

Thanks for sharing the carers network link. I havent had a look at that one but ive read info on young carers and carers aust so far. I sent a brief email to them today and asked about respite if not for now at least for november. Ive been told it can take a while to get it organised so best to start now.. add it to the list...... hopefully they will help though.

I just.. dont know anymore. I dont know what I want, or need.