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07-04-2023 09:47 PM
07-04-2023 09:47 PM
Extremely lonely, lost
Hi it’s night time and I’m about to go to bed but I’m not too happy about where I’m at life. I seem to be just merely existing rather than thriving. All my friends are “too busy” with their lofty jobs or I’m told I talk too much b*s* so not much point in looking at what I share despite most of the time all I want to do is share resources I found. I don’t have any close friends except for my mum but she’s taken she’s got her husband to think about. And yeah so it’s a bit lonely not having a friend to confide in and do adventures I no longer work or study study was too hard because home was hard and I got bullied by the totur. I love study but the tutor bullied me and then the confusing world of creative industries really made me feel like I was away with the fairies rather than doing something constructive. I don’t have a blue card so can’t do my dream job, criminal history and have been homeless. From someone who used to work five days a week to no one will hire me even if my health got back up sucks. I’m not doing anything productive except waiting for a friend to text (which they don’t). I somewho tried to learn to drive which I think everyone can do but somehow I can’t even drive an automatic let alone a manual (sure the driving instructor was freaked out). No matter how much I spend on driving lessons I don’t seem to be able to do it. I’m frustrated. Lonely. My mum says it’s ok for me to be what I call a bum basically have no aim in life but plod along going on every cruise there is, but I wanted to thrive not just live. Isnt that what children do? Anyways my mum always says the word success and dreams of having a car and plodding along isn’t really achieving any of that. I wanted to be the good girl mum envisioned by not having boyfriends, etc but I guess all the other people have it better than me as they’re independent and have work and even if I’m not into boys be nice to have a friend to talk with and travel and work and not just talk of their ailments because when I was around my dads friends trying to be the good girl all I got was excluded as they stated down at me and said I was too young to join the conversation please someone talk to me. I hate long weekends because I can’t just ring someone and have a natter. I went to a private school and to me they kinda just wasted time on theories that no one really can ascertain the answers to which to me translates to a waste of time. They could’ve thought me hairdressing or something rather than talk about why we exist. I’m now 25. Old I guess to be hired
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08-04-2023 04:23 PM
08-04-2023 04:23 PM
Re: Extremely lonely, lost
So young @Wills . So so young. As someone who is older I feel very obligated to remind you of this.
Probably more crucial to remember that time itself is construct. All our atoms are as old and as young as the universe n stuff.
I can remember the post-school social shock. As we grow through "time" play-time becomes more and more premium. Play is always premium. Through play we increase our game. Play is the game changer.
My thought or older, younger and all generations is:
The phrase "life is a game" only becomes true when we play.