Skip to main content
Forums Home
Illustration of people sitting and standing

New here?

Chat with other people who 'Get it'

with health professionals in the background to make sure everything is safe and supportive.

Register

Have an account?
Login

cancel
Showing results for 
Search instead for 
Did you mean: 

Something’s not right

Re: derogatory voice inside my head

Hi @greenpea  this is a great discussion. Seems many of  us here experience similar to what you describe. It's exhausting to live with. I remember praying to God when very young, I said; "it's one thing to have audible hallucinations by please please protect me from visual hallucinations" which has been so. But as for what's going on in our head...  It's a lonely journey because we are the only ones living it, nobody else next to us can say "I heard that too..."  

After my girl died suddenly, she talked to me often, like you describe - and in brief statements, still does. But there came a point where some tortured me  (criticism about my parenting and basically every mistake I ever  made:face_with_rolling_eyes:) after a while I realised "this was not my beautiful  girl's voice, but someone else, as she wasn't like that... So i put my hand up - if it hurts me I'm not listening to it anymore... Eventually, after a long while, those derogatory statements separated from my spiritual relationship girl. 

I think there's good and evil in the world, but also in our head (like a whole bloomin' universe in there lol). Trickery and deception can trap us, so we have to find a way to toss out the bad. 

The biggest breakthrough I had with separating  thoughts from me, my identity, was after I read the book "Taming the Blackdog" Very simple way of showing me that the bad thoughts / voices were created by the disease depression (blackdog) and not me. 

With childhood trauma some say our personality becomes fragmented and these thoughts are different parts of our suppressed self trying to be heard 🤔 Or the voices of those pivotal people around us then who we couldnt handle and had to detach from to survive.

My mother was particularly cruel but also i had 3 ugly pedaphiles in my family. I locked away parts of myself when had to suppress that trauma. Sometimes I think those parts of me want to be heard. 

So yeah, my stronger self has learnt to through back better 'oneliners' just as well as any critic, most days. But Stress does breaks down resilience wall sometimes. 

But this is just me Greenpea, and how I cope. I think my faith helps too because I believe in a loving God who wants good for me, not evil and so, if it's destructive on me I have to let that voice /sentence thought / concept... pass by (like we do in a busy street when a heavy rumbling large  semitrailer passes close to us). Easier said than done st andtimes I know, it takes practice, but with my girl, the last thing she said to me (when aganising over my parenting mistakes) she said with excitement from heaven, she said "none of that matters now" She's ok.

Thing is, we get to choose.

Am I making any sense or relevance here? Trying.

There's much talk about 'internal dialogue' too. 

Thing is - if it doesn't distress us it will pass. Negative emotion seems to feed it I think. So keep doing what you are and don't hook it in. 

Thank you for giving me the chance to put into words some of my experiences with this. And knowing I'm not alone. The professionals  dont really understand what its like.

 I feel for you greenpea and hope they dont just increase medication as the only help.  Let us know. Keep chatting here.

I pray these condeming critics pestering you will fade away forever. 

You're a sweetie Greenpea, a beautiful soul who deserves no less than loving nurture, joy, encouraging words, peace.... all the good stuff. Stay positive

precious ((((GP))))

proud of you. 

Hugzz-n-hugz 

💚💛🧡💔💜💙

EOR 

Re: derogatory voice inside my head

@Former-Member  Oh EOR what a beautiful post. I had no idea about your beautiful girl  still talking with you that is beautiful Heart. I had a dream of my grandma where in brief she came up close to me and hugged me. I felt the hug and I started crying ..... I woke up sobbing. That often happens when someone has died they come into a dream just standing smiling softly looking at me in a kind way.  On the odd occasions they talk to me.  I am a very spiritual person.

 

I once saw a renown clairvoiant who said I have a spirit attached to me. He is not a good one. One that smelt terribly. She also said some other things about me and where I live which she couldnt have known before hand.Could it be him which is causing all the problems idk. Do I believe in evil and good yes but it is not that black and white there is a grey area in between.

 

Thanks again EOR. I love you. peaxxx

 

 

Re: derogatory voice inside my head

Thanks @greenpea - talking with them can be risky because it can get hijacked. And the Bible says not to, so it is with great causion I even share this. And certainly don't promote clairvoyants, mediums and the like, for they too can be manipulated. And are themselves fallible. If someone told me I had an evil man hangin off me - I'd rebuke it with the authority of Jesus. You don't need to have those bad ideas and images put in your head. Toss it out. We need to balance the spiritual with the natural world because you're right, there's a grey area we can get lost in.
Grief gets tricky.
Occasionally,when SI escalates, there's an angry male voice growling "just do it!" And I know where that comes from. I think the beauty in nature brings to us a more calming influence. Any voice promoting the life behind the wind and the trees is worthy of much attention.
Better down screen and think about breakfast I guess.
Had a nightmare robbmebof sleep last night so bit slow today.
What are you doing today?
Sending light & love your way my GP 💚💚💚

Re: derogatory voice inside my head

@Former-Member  I just woke up after having a nice warm nap in my pea pod. Went down to 6 degrees where I am last night 😮 . Have a couple more hours before my ex and son2 come home so will enjoy the pea ce and quiet while it lasts. You are a lovely person and I will definately take on your advice. Have a beautiful day my friend EOR. Love peaxxxHeart

Re: derogatory voice inside my head

 

@greenpea  I was wondering if this breakthrough with voices could be that you are worried about your son overseas? That feeling of not being able to physically help and comfort them stirs up intense feelings.

i am worried about my son and his family at the moment (marital problems) and feel powerless. And although I don't actually hear a voice in my head I have lots of chatter/arguments with myself in my head. I have literally spoken words out in public without realising. It is draining. If knitting isn't your thing, could you try drawing, or painting or diamond art. I like working with shells it really makes you focus and time passes. Take care 💐🌺

Re: derogatory voice inside my head

@Former-Member  Thank you Always-hope for your kind reply. It could be re son as I am very worried about him. I will ask my psychiatrist all of this when I see her. The only thing is when I hear the voice I am not thinking of my son the voice just intrudes into my head. That is the best way to describe it it is an intruder in my normal thoughts.

Re: derogatory voice inside my head

hugs my sister @greenpea : Heart

I agree with @Former-Member , @Former-Member , @myheartache@Mazarita 

I myself have had some experiences too 

Re: derogatory voice inside my head

That was beautiful @Former-Member   I am so sorry for the pain that you have had to endure in your life 💐

The only way I can describe the thoughts I get is that I feel haunted. It can get me anytime and it's like all the things I have ever said or done wrong and they bombard me. Thankfully I don't hear a voice but my own inner turmoil.   @greenpea @Shaz51 @Mazarita @myheartache  And everyone else, my wish would be for it to all disappear and give you all peace. 💛💜

Re: derogatory voice inside my head


Thanks @Former-Member, it is hard. You describe it as beng "haunted by inner turmoil" I don't know why some of us are more susceptible to this torture of being so hard on ourselves, maybe past bullying or condemnation. My faith teaches "there is therefore no condemnation for those who are in Christ" (forgiven repentant and cleansed) but the mind in still flesh, and old habits take time to break. My sister causes me much grief, but I've learnt recently - so do I to her, without even trying... so I'm not sure how much of this caos we really have control over.
I know it's wrong to think it but i've had enough and just wanna go on the the 'Right2Die' list lol. Not that I won't miss this beautiful autumn weather and nature. Won't miss gravity, or isolation. So very tired.
Maybe it is just "imaginings" thoughts, or delusion and not voices, but no, not when you feel it also in the heart. Nobody can take that from me. Is it wrong, or harmful to anyone else?
I need help actually, not for this but overall, and there isn't any. Especially now with the national health emergency. Not much love in the world.
I donno what I'm saying, Betta shutup



Re: derogatory voice inside my head

Hello @Former-Member @I have been watching the program about kindy aged children and the elderly. Not all the time, i just seem to change the channel and there it is. The elderly feel forgotten by their family's feel like they have no purpose left in life. They withdraw physically and emotionally. But wow, when those little ones walkin they come alive.

i really believe loneliness is a killer. If Everyone could reach out to others who are lonely like volunteering your time to just pour a cup of tea, just having a chat and a reason to leave the house I think Everyone involved would be so much happier. 

Please don't give up on life.  There is love in the world and you have found it on here and you could in the real world too. We can't change the past but we can shape our future. To all out there who have got this far, you HAVE SURVIVED....YOU ARE A FIGHTER 💐🌻💛

Illustration of people sitting and standing

New here?

Chat with other people who 'Get it'

with health professionals in the background to make sure everything is safe and supportive.

Register

Have an account?
Login

For urgent assistance