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Bipolar

Evening all and thanks for having me. 
This is a first for me

 

My daughter 25 in June, suffers from Bipolar, servers anxiety and an eating disorder. She has also been sexually assaulted which makes the self hate even deeper. 

Diagnosed 5 years ago, a young dr told her a 20 year old, “we’ll try this drug because it’s the only one you won’t gain weight with” Well then she didn’t tell anyone anything as she was petrified of the alternatives. Years of her needing help. She was suicidal last year, and was hospitalised for 5 weeks. It was in that five weeks the eating disorder was diagnosed as well as her admitting to a nurse about the assault, and the nurse slipped when talking to us.
I had asked her many times about assault as she had three days stress leave when a high profile rape story hit the media. As a mum I knew then, but she would not admit it.
We live five hours away, and came to be with her staying for 3months last year. 
She won’t take the meds she needs as she has an eating disorder. Help is right there and she won’t touch it. If she does take then she’ll starve herself. One kilo to us is twenty to her. 


We are here again after reports of her not wanting to live, her bipolar and depressed state is as low as it’s ever been. 

She likes her psychiatrist, but as her family, we are extremely concerned. We don’t think she’s being honest with him and he seems to be doing nothing. She’s not talking to him and that’s the way she likes it.
It’s all private and we can’t ask any questions. I can’t say anything right. 

There seems to be little to no support for the support network and SANE is the first place I’ve stumbled over that has been on any decent help. 
We seem to be going in circles. She won’t take the meds because of self hatred and weight gain, but she seems to need them to address the self hate issues. Which comes first?

Her psychiatrist is not helping. 
We are staying in a motel as we have before, we know she’s not stable. I pray she’ll be alive in the morning,  every night. 
She had a plan last time she was admitted, so it’s still there looming.
I think she’s not being honest,  to keep out of hospital. We sit here, waiting for the inevitable. We can lead a horse to water…..

We just pray she’ll call Lifeline as she did before. 
Looking for any advice we can get and extremely grateful as her support network. 
In her world, she has not accepted it, she won’t accept it. She keeps sweeping it all under the mat so it will go away.
She won’t join forums, won’t seek out any more psychologists, and won’t talk. In her world it’s not ok to be not ok. She’s very unwell. 

She does not think talking helps, and she won’t talk. 
As a mum, I just don’t know what to do. We’re going around and around. Help is right there and she won’t touch it. 
I’m so worried  we haven’t hit the bottom yet, and she won’t turn this around until she does, if, she survives it. 

Advice appreciated 🙏

 

 

1 REPLY 1

Re: Bipolar

Welcome to SANE, the guided service might be useful for you - it is available to families/carers as well as people experiencing complex mental health issues. Eligibility is postcode based currently (although we have requested an extension from Government to remove postcode as a barrier - hoping to find out if that is successful in the next couple of weeks). You can check your eligibility as a carer here on this link: https://www.sane.org/referral#registering-myself and you can check your daughters eligibility as well here: https://www.sane.org/referral#someone-else - sometimes being present and making the call together helps. Our SANE helpline can also assist you with safety planning resources, and this link is to a useful guide: https://sprc.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/01/SafetyPlanningGuide-Quick-Guide-for-Clinicians.pdf

The SANE forums ebb and flow in activity so please do keep checking in and join other threads - as a new member that can be helpful to network and get started.
Rachel, SANE CEO
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