Looking for peer reviewers

[PeppiPatty]

Dear @Decadian

Okay it's 8.30 pm and I'm going to start making dinner. I cannot stop reading your message.........

I never knew what she wanted - and that word "complex" became apparent in many of it's meanings - life was complex, it seemed I had a complex, for a long time no one thought the child had a complex, I am sure my mother had a complex.

I went to have coffee with a relatives' best friend yesterday. Because Perth is so .............. small and My husband and I grew up in the same crowds.......my husband was best friends with his son in his early 20s to about 28. My husband was ostracised and mistreated by his son.......anyway...theres another thesis in me to write when I go back to University ( never) Unlike anyone else in PErth, his son treated me with utmost respect. My relative's best friend's son considered me his sister and he cared for me very much when we were young.

But at the end of our lovely coffee he says..... out of the blue....he knew my Mum.....not really but I guess through our joint relative ......." I have never understood why your Mother has treated you so badly. " I was surprised. I wanted to hug him ( very inappropriate because he is very ......not huggable and is very wealthy and un huggable) 

But I realised how Mun's  life has determined her not to be close to me and ALWAYS negate me. It' was a life long burden for me until about 42 years old. It probably switched to owning my own dog then. That complex which I hope hope doesnt become my complex again. You help me @Decadian

[Decadian]

Hi @PeppiPatty

It's rather cold and beastly in Melbourne and I have a funeral on Monday but apart from those things I am feeling okay -

Thanks so much for the comments on what I have written -if I can ever help anyone with my writing I will feel all the trauma in my life will have been worth it - and maybe this is my role in society - because for some reason the light that burns within me has never been quenched - my mother never did break my spirit and if she knows now - she will realised she missed out on a relationship with a daughter worth having - and that is sad for her -

But I really hope to have my ideas formed into more cohesive patterns to write a book on my son's life - which is hard -

Who knows why people - esp our own mothers - can be so beastly toward us - but they have been and for some people they still are

One thing about living in Melboune with its huge suburban wilderness we can live more private lives - and as people are so interested in poking their noses into other people's sorrow for a few snippets of gossip a big city is a good place to be, How empty the lives of so many people are - that they want to know the special agony of a few and to spread it further

Many thanks for your comment @PeppiPatty - they are thoughtful though painful, and encouraging

I am not alone

Decadian

[Decadian]

More fantastic thoughts @PeppiPatty

It was not until I was seeing the psychologist I saw for about 18 months since my mother died that I realised how easily I read, research and sort my thoughts and then write my ideas - it was a breakthrough for me - and more and more I realise I have a responsibiltiy to use these skills for the betterment of society - and here is a good place to start

Being under the pump in emergency - yes - I have had enough of that - not in emergency much - but when I have been confronted by people ill-equiped to deal with mental disorders that I have become extremely agro and non-compliant - in 1977 I found myself in a mysterious world with a language I did not comprehend and felt like Hamlet with someone trying to prove I was "crazy" and I was just "burned-out"

Still - how many people have been confronted with

"Do you hear voices?"

"Of course"

"Are they speaking to you now?"

"One is"

"What is that voice saying?"

"You should know - you are speaking to me now and there is nothing at all wrong with my hearing"

Anyway - since then I have learned that people do hear different voices that no one else can hear - but yes - dump that on a newbie and any answers could have someone under a Mental Act Order immediately - so this is a strange world indeed - when the workers can twist what people say and be cruel and worse - and since that baptism of inappropriate language I have been through the mill and understand how hard the world can be for those who do the hard work of psychotherapy and those who care for them

So yes - many people would be slow to seek help - and of course - being forced to take medication they do not want would be humiliating and as that medication can cause people to be dazed and confused - it would be worse I think -

And I have heard of people being put onto a programme stuck on the fridge - sleeping programme, eating programme, medication programme - all sorts of programme - and I know I have had a little shot at this with the Sleep Police and the Food Police and all sorts of police - I find this boring and wonder if anyone can get well with something like this -

So it is a tough world - I have been on the edges of this for most of my life - and it seems to me that being unhappy and isolated is better than being depressed and having attachment or lack of attachment disorders

So the labels and the treatments must work for some people - but not all - not all at all - but the answers must lie somewhere in all the research done and the books written and the psychology studied

And I know I have been incredible lucky with the people I have had to help me through the trauma cause by my abusive mother, my disturbed son and my toxic sister, but there have been times when the people supposedly there to help have been agressive and unhelpful

So yes - I can read what you are writing and understand that - and care a lot - and feel for myself the way opening ahead of me

Thanks again for your comments

Decadian

[PeppiPatty]

DEar @Former-Member

What a great statement. It took me over 2 years to understand the real definition of delusions and hallucionations mean. 

I had to find it inside myself to really understand it for my darling husband. 

HEre is a definition that I lifted from a website online and I like it:

According to delusional - Dictionary Definition
Delusional comes from a Latin word meaning "deceiving." So  delusional thinking is kind of like deceiving yourself by believing  outrageous things. Delusional thoughts are often a sign of mental  illness, but the word can also be used more loosely to describe behavior  that is just not realistic.

Fact vs myth: mental illness & violence

I'm gong to comment on this. But there are things that I dont like about what is written. Ille need to think about it. It's veryunfair that I'm writing that so I'lle think about it.

PP :0)