In hospital and terrified

[Dimity]

Hello

I've just had surgery in a private hospital and there's been communication stuff ups over a discharge late in the day and I'm scared I'm psychotic. I've had broken sleep but took a prn a couple of nights ago. I don't know what's happening in some respects.

TW 

Content/trigger warning

I'm surrounded by unsanitary clutter from this afternoon and it looks as though I'll have to sleep in it. I don't know if the hospital delaying for hours then me not going means I'm refusing to leave or if pushing for the missing discharge meds and instructions means I'm discharging myself. There were staff yelling at me over their own contradictions about catheter care. I was distressed and confused and tried to stay logical. I've upset a lot of people  staff  and family trying to work though it all. 

I'm scared.

[Jynx]

@Dimity oh hun that is so rough!! And after such a huge shock to your system too, your body is probably craving the comforts of home more than anything hey. 

Have you been able to let them know you're concerned you might be psychotic? 

Sending hugs darlin 🫂🫂

[Dimity]

Thanks @Jynx while trying to stay cool calm and collected I mentioned not knowing if confusion was me or circumstance and my red flags of sleep loss and post-anaesthesia when asking for prn top up tonight of my antipsychotic without spelling out psychosis. A little voice tells me they're probably onto that. I hate feeling I'm at cross-purposes with everyone,  maybe I'm also neurodiverse. I don't mean to be rude I just try say it like it is, I don't think of the right words or something. I'm slow on the uptake at times.

[Jynx]

@Dimity I feel that, I get in trouble at times cos of how much I hate subtext and will very blunt with people without realising it feels 'rude' to em. Right now tho, I reckon you're allowed to be focused purely on your own needs hey!! 

I'm off hun, sending you some hugs and hope that things shift soon 🤞💜

[Dimity]

I feel awful now because of the chain of authorisations that have to be rung through.

[Patches59]

@Dimity  I’m so sorry to hear what you have been going through.  Anaesthetic certainly can cause different reactions for different people.  

If one is available, could talking to a hospital social worker possible help?  Someone who hasn’t been involved with things today and sees things through neutral, fresh eyes

sending hugs and wishes for a restful night sleep. ❤️‍🩹

[Eden1919]

@Dimity  hi i am sorry you are having such a rough time i think surgery can have some intense after affects from anaesthesia and other drugs they give you so i would give a couple of days to let it get out of your system before you will know if you are unwell again or not. it doesnt sound like the hospital staff are being very nice they shouldnt make you feel like a burden but i understand that this does happen often in hospitals to be fair. what do you think would be most helpful for you? can you make a list of things that might help and show it to your family or the staff to see if they can help? anyway i hope you start to feel better soon.