Something’s not right
Hi @sjpersonal,
Welcome to the forums. I'm afraid I don't have any magic solution for you, but I can certainly relate to your predicament. I am a 40-year old woman with ASD. Although I have been in the mental health system and with one therapist or another since I was 19, no-one picked up the minor little detail of autism. All of my issues were seen only through the lens of my primary psychiatric diagnosis of borderline personality disorder. I finally figured out for myself that I had ASD when I was 36 years old and I then paid to get formally assessed at an autism specialist clinic.
I have had one awful experience after another, trying to get support. Last week I saw my eleventh therapist in eighteen months. It did not go well, to say the least!!!
I have pretty much given up hope of finding anyone who genuinely gets both the ASD and the mental health stuff. My uni counsellor was awesome with it, and so was a psychologist that she found for me (but who then closed her practice a few months after I started seeing her). I simply haven't been able to find anyone else who gets it.
I was on the waiting list for a private psychiatrist for 18 months. When an appointment finally came up, my GP sent her information about my situation. The psychiatrist then called my GP and said she would not see me because I was "too complex." 
So...as I said, I don't have any answers for you, I can only tell you that you are not alone in facing this predicament. It seems to me that most mental health professionals know very little about ASD and those who are very interested in it, then tend to work exclusively with ASD clients and thus don't have a strong understanding of complex mental health issues. Thus those of us who have both ASD and a complex mental health issue kind-of live in a gap.
I hope you are at least able to feel supported here in Forum Land @sjpersonal.
Sorry things are so tight right now.
Do you have any experiences or interests or passions that can help distract you or even just structure your time.
It is far more difficult to get help without money ... there is not a level playing field in this world ... I know all about that.
Keep trying though. For yourself and those in your life.
Even if people dont seem to be able to make a big difference. We are all connected and do influence each other. Try and make it for the good.
Hi again @sjpersonal,
It sucks that you have so little support around you. I am also totally estranged from my family and quite alone in this world. I understand how scary it can be, especially when you have communication issues and can't always advocate for yourself. Like @Appleblossom said, it really isn't a fair playing field out there. Right now the awesome people here in Forum Land and on the end of the phone at the SANE helpline are keeping me afloat. It is really tough and really scary, and I very much wish I had an answer for you.
I have had a heap of abandonment issues and self identify as autistic or Aspie, but also have worked at a lot of emotional and relational stuff
As @Phoenix_Rising has a heap of experience too and we are insightful and nutty in a completely beautiful and humourous way.... or at least we try to be.
