Lived Experience Forum

[Gillie1]

That's what I've been doing for years. It just gave her the sense she could say or do anything without repercussions. 

[NatureLover]

Sorry to hear what's happening, @Gillie1  😞

I agree with @Former-Member , record all your interactions with her (video plus audio) in future, and also seek advice from your local community free legal service. 

Good luck...

[Gillie1]

Thanks guys. 

I will keep your feedback in mind. I am not going to confront her or give her anything extra to complain about. I just need to stop letting things slide. Call what is abusive to people who matter and let the rest go. 

[Former-Member]

@Gillie1 @NatureLover @Kyle1 @mattee @Oaktree 

Hi at Gillie1

I agree with your conclusion.

Document things in case you act.

Police need facts. Dates, times.

Stories have no value.

Yes. You need to stop letting things slide. As hard as it is to find joy in these situations, find something you can enjoy.

Do not let her rob your joy.

Even helping others, like we do on this SANE forum is a good distration.

You cannot stop neighbour chatting.

You can control your reaction.

Hopefully others get sjck of her stories

[justanotherguy]

@Gillie1 , sorry to hear about your neighbour issues, I've had them too. In life there seems to be victims and bullies and she is just a bully. My neighbour is the same, although with the problems I've had with medications I haven't helped. Trying to be nice all the time just not work with bullies, they use it as fuel for more abuse. Instead try to antagonise them a bit. Just something small and not harmful, think about what annoys them and do it on purpose, and see their reaction. You'll soon see if they have any self control or not and can then judge better how to deal with them.

[Gillie1]

Hey @justanotherguy .

I already know how much self control she has. She is a bully but presents so sweet as pie. Others are coming to see that. She can have the backyard space to herself. It's not worth hearing the crap mumbling from over the fence but we need to share the park.  She can easily take her dog for a walk any time she wants to but between anxiety and mobility issues its much more difficult for me. I just hate how she is influencing the other dog owners. I noticed it this morning. I am so ready to move. 

[Gillie1]

Yesterday was a good day. I was out in the park while my cleaner was busy and so many people and dogs interacted with us positively. My neighbor stayed away and we just did our own thing me cookie and my support worker. Then my coordinator came and we made some progress re moving and scooter. 

The police have reports from me and my cleaner and I don't think they want to take the effort of charging her. But knowing that she has been caught out will hopefully get her to pull her head in till I can move. I don't really see what official charges will help but I don't know what else to do atm.

I'll keep working on Cookie's training and giving her a time out when she barks or gets overtired or overexcited but I'm feeling less anxious about her being judged while she learns. 

The thing is dogs are very perceptive, our dogs would probably get on well if they didn't have human prejudice to work out.

Last night Cookie actively helped me to calm my anxiety. We were off to sleep and she realized I was getting more anxious so she moved into a less comfortable position to rest her head on my heart. Just to help me settle. She's changing my world every day.