Lived Experience Forum

[Former-Member]

@down_not_out , @Oaktree  @Historylover   @Snowdragon 

I also like your name!

My neighbours abused me daily for many many years. Let me say 10 years spent in courts.

I never left because l did not want to be abused returning.

I was advised l was Hypervigilant.

Hypervigilance — the elevated state of constantly assessing potential threats around you — is often the result of a trauma. People who have been in combat, have survived abuse, or have posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD) can exhibit hypervigilance.

I have security cameras and could see them on my phone so l knew what to expect.

I found strenth in faith.

Even though things are better, i still am very reserved about venturing out.

Tomorrow l am going to the country to help someone.

I am very lucky l have another outlet. And nice neighbours.

I hear you.

Make small steps.

[Historylover]

@down_not_out, I'm so sorry for your trauma. People do such enormous harm to others and, most often, there are no consequences for them. It's as if it never happened, while we are so seriously wounded. I hope you find some peace as you go through your healing process. Take it slowly and at your own pace. I can only wish you well and send you my best wishes.

[NatureLover]

Welcome, @down_not_out . I'm sorry to hear about your agoraphobia and trauma 😞

I also have agoraphobia but can leave the house as long as it's not for too long (5 hours max) and not too far away. 

What helped was discussing my trauma with a psychologist...do you have any professional support? 

[down_not_out]

Hi @NatureLover 

I appreciate your words of encouragement.

Trust is a major issue for me at the moment. The abuse I suffered was at the hands of 'professional' health workers. My whole sense of self-worth was completely taken away from me.

Opening up is going to be extremely difficult but I doubt that anything worthwhile in this life comes without effort. 

Taking the first step is the hardest part. 

[Eve7]

Welcome to the forums @down_not_out and we’ll done on your achievements so far with, I’m sure, more to come.

There are lots of friendly people here who will willingly share their own lived experience.

You’ve taken a big step by sharing on here.

[NatureLover]

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@down_not_out wrote:

Trust is a major issue for me at the moment. The abuse I suffered was at the hands of 'professional' health workers. My whole sense of self-worth was completely taken away from me.

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@down_not_out  I'm sorry to hear 😞 I can see how that would make it very hard to open up to a health professional like a psychologist.

One idea might be to write down what you wrote to me in your post above, about how trust is a major issue and why, and hand it to a psychologist. That way if you clam up, they still know what you're trying to say. I always write down my issues and give it to my psychologist to read. 

Wishing you all the best, @down_not_out ...