Back home from trip away. Mixed coping for Mr Darcy, less crying, more OCD.
After looking at some properties with a view to perhaps moving a little closer to family. Mr Darcy seems to be keen to move and has already contacted two agents locally to come out and look at our place.
@Faith-and-Hope I have long felt our place is socially isolated (not within waking distance of anything, too far for family to visit etc). Although we are enjoying the garden again, over all it is too much for us to manage.
I think my fears are more around Mr Darcy's stability. He is not safely off the last of his crisis meds and is not doing quite so well. MI + moves = relapse potential. Whilst Mr Darcy feels everything has gone wrong since moving here, the friends we have made have been so very supportive and kind.
There are the practicalities of learning a new MH Act and having to find a new treatment and care team.
We are not up to diagnoais or support teams yet, but even the prospect of all of that is daunting, and because my mr. is spending time in the West and seeing a dr. there for general medical care, it is possible he could land in a treatment centre over there. I really can’t afford to think much about it ..... and I am presuming on a treatment centre somewhere in our future because Inhave read personal accounts where people have had a fraction of only one aspect of mr.f&h’s addictions and they have needed months in a treatment centre.
I haven’t even wanted to start again with a new psychologist for me
over here (it seems pointless as well) ..... my studies and casual supports seems to be enough.
I know you are further along this “process” than we are and have established good support systems regarding treatment. And it is the priority ...... but that is not to say that the new ones wouldn’t be just as good or better ?
It is difficult, but it sounds like you are feeling drawn to the change, and as a carer support for you is just as critical. And the size of the property will slowly continue in the direction of becoming a burden to you, as will the social isolation.
Can this be achieved in stages ? If you were to identify where you might like to live, can you spend weekends there to get to know the area, the resources and the people a bit first ?
Yes @Faith-and-Hope I think that change might be beneficial, have realised that our present home is too much for us but did not feel at peace about moving elsewhere locally. I think with a lot of things that as I process things I tend to start with the negatives such as the stresses are involved with moving before looking at the positives (like you, we have done it a few times) unfortunately a transition is not practical or affordable for us. Home is where the heart is and for me that for me is the people, not the building.
The positive is that we will be nearer family, not too close but enough to justify travel time for a long weekend visit (although there are some cousins I have not seen for years relatively close). We picked the location as there are adequate psych services available and a milder climate.
Medically Mr Darcy has not really been fond of any of the pdocs he has seen and only goes out of necessity, but our local GP has been lovely and we will miss him. All pdocs are trained to a standard but to find one where you have a good working relationship is difficult and this was certainly a problem early on.
From a carer point of view, it has only been in more recent times that I have found a counselor who understands me (and who will be delighted that we have bitten the bullet and are taking steps toward moving). I can see why you would not want to start again with another psychologist.
There are some carer services available in new place which I will certainly check out. The mental health support organisation which I get free carer support from here does not operate interstate and I have not been able to find a similar service on line but will be making enquiries, I don't know if I am googling poorly but there seems to be a dearth of services when compared to other regions.
We need to get some checks underway in relation to one of the properties that we saw that Mr Darcy was particularly fond of and get this place thoroughly cleaned so we can list it. If things are meant to be, they will happen.
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